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It's like, 'Hey, look at me, I'm having a good time. Then you're just what they're looking for. Never mind the press conferences get the big knife out of the drawer. THIS IS A RUSH TRANSCRIPT. Apparently, his last ballot was cast in 1972for McGovern. Everybody says they suck. It was during the waning of the Nixon years, where confidence in government was beginning its slide down to the Stygian depths where it rests today; the Vietnam War, and racial unrest, continued to rage on. Please validate my existence. Results like these do not belong on the rsum of a Supreme Being. Dst7cSE99`YpOqBp@&+69ykl95-! Whatever happened WellWell he's about to find out! He was raised an Irish Catholic, even an alter boy, and attended a Catholic school until the age of 15, when he dropped out of school.[1]. Carlin considered conservatives and Republicans the greedy, warmongering class in political ideologies. Carlin, for 40-years, was one of the greatest comedians ever. That's a friend. If you are interested in using one of my images for your website, or if you would like a print, please contact me directly (See the Contact tab). George Carlin on why he likes disasters and people under pressure, and why the planet is doin' just fine. 0000002803 00000 n 0000005590 00000 n 160 Copy quote. That's why we need people who can make the TOUGH DECISIONS. endobj George Denis Patrick Carlin (May 12, 1937 June 22, 2008) was an American stand-up comedian, actor, author, and social critic. v. Pacifica Foundation, in which a 54 decision affirmed the government's power to regulate indecent material on the public airwaves. So, I have solved this little political dilemma for myself in a very simple way. When they're in trouble, their explanations usually begin simply with words like MISS-COMMUNICATION; QUESTION:WHAT DID YOU DO WRONG, SENATOR?POLITICIAN:WELL, IT WAS A MISS-COMMUNICATION. 189 0 obj Sure, here's a transcript of George Carlin talking about social media: "Social media, huh? But I'm sure they will still remove this. Global Search Search In. Fuck hope! A friend is someone you can count on. Speakola is a labour of love and Id be very grateful if you would share, tweet or like it. In this blog post, we'll take a look at some of Carlin's most famous quotes on government. It's like we're living in this weird dystopian future where everyone is constantly monitoring each other, waiting for the opportunity to pounce. I mean, why do we need to see some idiot eating Tide pods or jumping off a roof into a pool? So, the next time you're walking around looking at your phone, tweeting and Instagramming and Facebooking, just remember this: you're not living in the real world, you're living in the digital world. I dont vote. Save the planet, we don't even know how to take care of ourselves yet. But just as pressure and heat transform coal into diamonds, it's that frustration, social pressure and the heat of anger that transforms us into comedians. Yeah, right. Marc Allan: Oh, okay, good. They should be based on the parents' performance. So if you are easily offended dont click the link. Thats what the owners count on. You enjoy yourselves; itll be a lot of fun. 0000053233 00000 n It has to be the WHOLE THING. << /Length 5 0 R /Filter /FlateDecode >> TOUGH DECISIONS like: POLITICIAN (PLANNING):HOW MUCH SOFT MONEY CAN I EXPECT TO COLLECT IN EXCHANGE FOR MY CORE VALUES? They dont fall out of the sky. And there you have it, a transcript of George Carlin's take on social media. Maher was raised a Catholic (but has a Jewish mother). And so when finally all the facts come out and our subject seems quite guilty he employs that sublime use of the passive voice: POLITICIAN:MISTAKES WERE MADE. But first thing the next morning, I became a sun-worshipper. Theres a nice campaign slogan for somebody: the public sucks, fuck hope. Use section headers above different song parts like [Verse], [Chorus], etc. He was born May 12, 1937, in New York City into an Irish Catholic family, but he rejected the faith. It's all just noise. Your vote is what determines the direction this Great Ship America will turn. They dont fall out of the sky. We're addicted to the attention, the likes, the validation. Now you can just hide behind a screen and fire off your misspelled, grammatically incorrect rants to thousands of strangers. Did you ever think about the arithmetic? So Ive made what i hope is a more readable version below, so this classic piece of polemical gold can be shared and understood more widely. George Carlin was an American stand-up comedian, actor, social critic and author. Then youre just what theyre looking for. That's a big activity here in Washington! I just wanna put this behind me and that's an expression we hear a lot these days in all walks of lives. So, I know that a little later on this year youre gunna have another one of those really swell presidential elections that you like so much [Bill Clinton v. Bob Dole]. It's like a bunch of robots pretending to be human. They want obedient workers. In fact, it might be the thing that's making you unhappy. It's always the whole thing. You can't have an opinion anymore without being labeled as something. George Carlin was known for his insightful and humorous observations on modern society, including his thoughts on social media. Not in the abstract they don't. It would seem to fly in the face of that other rhetorical standby that: POLITICIAN:THE AMERICAN PEOPLE ARE LOT SMARTER THAN THEY ARE GIVEN CREDIT FOR. Now theres one thing you might have noticed i dont complain about: politicians. They don't fall out of the sky. THIS IS A RUSH TRANSCRIPT. Carlin is funny as hell. George Carlin > Quotes > Quotable Quote (?) Updated on May 30, 2018. To learn more, check out our transcription guide or visit our transcribers forum, Comedian George Carlins take on The Ten Commandments. Now hes on the side of law and order, jiu jitsu really: POLITICIAN:WE'RE TRYING TO GET TO THE BOTTOM OF THIS SO WE CAN GET THE FACTS OUT TO THE AMERICAN PEOPLE. And just dumb enough to passively accept all these increasingly shitty jobs with the lower pay, the longer hours, the reduced benefits, the end of overtime and vanishing pension that disappears the minute you go to collect it, and now theyre coming for your Social Security money. Everybody complains about politicians. George Denis Patrick Carlin (May 12, 1937 - June 22, 2008) was an American stand-up comedian, actor, author, and social critic. BUT WHEN I DO, I'LL ADVISE YOU. Another favorite distortion is Public Service. It's like they're part of some kind of digital echo chamber. Real connection comes from being present with other people, from having meaningful conversations, from doing things together. stream So my advice is this: put down your phone, go outside, and actually live your life. xWnF}WDh%&^6F%&T{84e[A0@-3wUr-*l:, XF{HT+T0?LL q8"y1yY0LV"vQ|8:GwPBr,&]Qt7oz5n Nobody cares. Because the owners, the owners of this country dont want that. Well, where do people think these politicians come from? I HAVEN'T DETERMINED THAT YET. 186 0 obj THIS COPY MAY NOT BE IN ITS FINAL FORM AND MAY BE UPDATED. And it's not just that social media is a distraction from real life, it's also a way of creating a false sense of connection. George Carlin was born and raised in Manhattan, New York in 1937 and died in Santa Monica, California in 2008. In 2017, Rolling Stone magazine ranked him second (behind Richard Pryor) on its list of the 50 best stand-up comics of all time. I don't words that conceal reality. These are the websites where people go to express themselves, right? 185 0 obj Several reasons. In 2008, he was posthumously awarded the Mark Twain Prize for American Humor. They want more for themselves and less for everybody else, but Ill tell you what they dont want: They dont want a population of citizens capable of critical thinking. What? And the problem is, we're comparing our real lives to other people's highlight reels. They're your followers. Yeah the public sucks. You have no right to complain. 203 0 obj The politicians are put there to give you the idea you have freedom of choice. Cause Americans have a lot of trouble dealing with reality. Reading the text, it sounds like a reasonably serious essaywell, sort of. You got people walking around bumping into each other, looking down at their phones, tweeting, Instagramming, Facebooking, like they're all little paparazzi. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns. <>/Border[0 0 0]/Contents(English Language and Literature Commons)/Rect[137.2383 212.4906 328.3613 224.2094]/StructParent 5/Subtype/Link/Type/Annot>> Youre just gunna wind up with a brand new bunch of selfish, ignorant Americans [leaders]. We're all becoming like Goldfish, swimming around in our own little bowls, looking at the world through a curved piece of glass. Look them in the eye, shake their hand, and share your thoughts and feelings in person. That's because now he's feeling the heat and so as time passes and more evidence comes in he suddenly changes directions and tells us: POLITICIAN:WERE TRYING TO GET TO THE BOTTOM OF THIS! "Save the trees, save the bees, save the whales, save those snails." 0000080920 00000 n For added emotional impact sons and daughters can always be substituted for men and women and so I think we can sum this up. We're not rats', Rectorial address, Glasgow University - 1972, For Geoffrey Tozer: 'I have to say we all let him down', by Paul Keating - 2009, for James Baldwin: 'Jimmy. But marital fidelity is a good idea, so I suggest we keep the idea and call this commandment "Thou shalt not be unfaithful." Vodafone Ad. Its never going to get any better, dont look for it, be happy with what youve got. Isnt it a bit ironic, though, that the audience is laughing at all this when, essentially, Carlin is saying to them, directly to their faces, that they are stupid? We invite you and ask you to help us update this wiki by editing it. They should be earned. It covers the most famous 'rant' part of the speech. Its hard to say if he was a Republican or a Democrat, however, as he refused to vote, considering it pointless because voting, as he said, is the illusion of choice.[4]. Some parents deserve respect. It's like the Wild West of the internet, but with more trolls. Famous Quotes by George Carlin about Politics. They own and control the corporations. They are us', Address to Parliament following Christchurch massacre - 2019, Dolores Ibrruri: "No Pasarn!, They shall not pass! 0000003901 00000 n This is what we have to offer. And nobody seems to notice. But social media is just a symptom of our narcissistic, attention-deficit culture. George Carlin Discusses 'Silly Putty and Napalm' Aired June 08, 2001 - 21:00 ET. Now theres one thing you mighta noticed I dont complain about: politicians. [3], Carlin was equally hard on politics as he was on religion. Nothing wrong with the planet. Garbage ingarbage out. 0000008961 00000 n The table is tilted folks. Our country is failing because the majority of the people are selfish. I, on the other handwho did not votewho did not votewho, in fact, did not even leave the house on Election Day, am in no way responsible for what these people have done and have every right to complain as loud as I want about the mess you created that I had nothing to do with. 187 0 obj Sure, there's some good stuff on there, but it's mostly just people filming themselves doing stupid things and hoping to go viral. The big wealthy business interests that control things and make all the important decisions. (LAUGHS). endobj You don't. You have no choice. MISTAKES WERE MADE, DON'T LOOK AT ME, PROBABLY SOMEONE IN MY OFFICE. POLITICIAN:I ADVISED HIM THAT I HAD MADE A JUDGMENT. This is the best we can do, folks. WHEN THE HEARINGS HAVE CONCLUDED, I WILL MAKE A JUDGMENT OR I MIGHT MAKE AN ASSESSMENT. You, and I, are not in the big club. Good honest hard-working people; white collar, blue collar it doesnt matter what color shirt you have on. His parents split up when he was an infant because his . But a comedian has the ability to use their anger and intelligence to refocus and reconstruct their pain into entertainment. Given the nature of our current Administration, I thought it timely to revisit what George said years ago (Back In Town HBO Special, 1996) about American politicians and the American people who elect them. hb```b``na` cc`ahd`phQD"#. -{- f1^u0`cp@&CUoM;v> You know what they want? They dont pass through a membrane from another reality. I'm tired of fucking Earth Day, I'm tired of these self-righteous environmentalists, these white, bourgeois liberals who think the only thing wrong with this country is there aren't enough bicycle paths. However, most of his bile was reserved for conservatives and Republicans. The planet is fine. I know, they say, they say: well if you dont vote you have no right to complain. And don't even get me started on the whole idea of 'friends' on social media. ', And let's not forget the humblebrags. Youre just going to wind up with a brand new bunch of selfish, ignorant Americans. The politicians are put there to give you the idea that you have freedom of choice. Hi speech lovers,With costs of hosting website and podcast, this labour of love has become a difficult financial proposition in recent times. To avoid redundancy in the comments section, we kindly ask /u/arkreder to respond to this comment with the prompt you used to generate the output in this post, so that others may also try it out. "Now, there's one thing you might have noticed I don't complain about: politicians. They want your retirement money. We'll start with the first three, and I'll use the Roman Catholic version because those are the ones I was fed as a little boy. But it's all a facade. About Press Copyright Contact us Creators Advertise Developers Terms Privacy Policy & Safety How YouTube works Test new features NFL Sunday Ticket Press Copyright . 184 0 obj The politicians, the celebrities, and the lawyers, and although their level of insincerity is astonishing, it's still kinda fun to hear them talk. [5] And another one: Because if it is really just the fault of the politicians then where are all the other bright people of conscience? They say, Well, if you dont vote you have no right to complain. But wheres the logic in that? <>/Border[0 0 0]/Contents( M o n t c l a i r S t a t e U n i v e r s i t y \n D i g i t a l C o m m o n s)/Rect[308.9844 674.625 540.0 693.375]/StructParent 1/Subtype/Link/Type/Annot>> I think what we really need more of is ritual suicide, you know. Politicians have traditionally hidden behind three things, the flag, the Bible and children. An INITIATIVE is an idea that isn't going anywhere! You crowned us', by Toni Morrison - 1988, for Michael Gordon: '13 days ago my Dads big, beautiful, generous heart suddenly stopped beating', by Scott and Sarah Gordon - 2018, Tara Westover: 'Your avatar isn't real, it isn't terribly far from a lie', The Un-Instagrammable Self, Northeastern University - 2019, Tim Minchin: 'Being an artist requires massive reserves of self-belief', WAAPA - 2019, Atul Gawande: 'Curiosity and What Equality Really Means', UCLA Medical School - 2018, Abby Wambach: 'We are the wolves', Barnard College - 2018, Eric Idle: 'America is 300 million people all walking in the same direction, singing 'I Did It My Way'', Whitman College - 2013, Shirley Chisholm: ;America has gone to sleep', Greenfield High School - 1983, Joe Marler: 'Get back on the horse', Harlequins v Bath pre game interview - 2019, Ray Lewis : 'The greatest pain of my life is the reason I'm standing here today', 52 Cards -, Mel Jones: 'If she was Bradman on the field, she was definitely Keith Miller off the field', Betty Wilson's induction into Australian Cricket Hall of Fame - 2017, Jeff Thomson: 'Its all those people that help you as kids', Hall of Fame - 2016, Dan Angelucci: 'The Best (Best Man) Speech of all time', for Don and Katherine - 2019, Hallerman Sisters: 'Oh sister now we have to let you gooooo!'